Thursday things, injuries, animals, and stuff

Have you guys seen this?

They aren’t shipping yet but you can pre-order them and you can bet your sweet ass I’m going to.  I’ll probably have to hide it from MacGyver though because I’m sure he’ll try and steal it from me.

If you happened to notice my absence the last few days I must confess I’ve been all kinds of busy and when things get so hectic that can’t keep up, I have to prioritize and unfortunately the blog did not make the cut, but I’m back now so it’s all good.

I’m working super hard so that I can take some time off at the end of the month to go to Tennessee to attend a wedding, and also because I sort of like having fun on the weekends every now and then in case you hadn’t noticed but for some reason springtime gets really crazy around here.

Earlier in the week I was raking up leaves in the backyard one evening and a rogue limb fell out of a large tree right on my head and my arm.  I can’t show you my head since there was no visible damage but here is what my wrist looked like.


Pretty, huh?

Apparently some of the people who speed through our neighborhood on the way to work in the morning have complained about the presence of peacocks in the street.  So last week on three early morning runs I watched in horror as the sheriff’s wildlife division rounded up hundreds of peacocks, put them in cages, and carted them away.  I did not run by without protest though.  I rounded the corner and scared a lot of them away from the cages.

Damn those speeder’s and their complaining.  Oh, and did I mention there happens to be a drug house 2 doors down from the peacock farm.  I wonder why the sheriff’s department never bothered to cage those idiots!


Charles is still safe in my yard because he loves me.

I tend to collect animals.  Last night I was raking leaves, yet again, and I found a newly hatched slider turtle who had gotten lost on his way to the pond.

Turd Butt the Turtle

His name is Turd Butt.  (There’s that 12 year old boy sense of humor.)  Anyhow, we’re keeping him.  He’s already imprinted on me anyway, (can they really do that?), and I like him.

One last thing to share.  I’m pretty sure I’m going to get a hundred orders once y’all see this next thing but I can fulfill them, I swear.

MacGyver and I were garage sale shopping and we happened upon this beauty:

ugly table

I want you to soak in her magnificent beauty.

Go ahead,  soak it in.  Revel in it.  Let it marinate a little.  Check out the luxurious lines and wonderful style that just resonates 1970.

I had to have it!  Had to.  In fact, I loved it so much, I bought its twin sister.  I now have two.

Except that one of them now looks like this:

New end table

And it’s no longer just an end table, it’s a cute end table but it’s not just a cute end table, no.


End Table dog house

It’s a Dog House!

And at night it looks like this:

Hanks new doghouse

Because, yes, I even installed lighting!

So as if I didn’t have enough on my plate I’ve decided that I’m going to make animal houses that can also be used as everyday furniture.  This one can be used as an end table or a nightstand.  It would look so cute in a beach house, don’t you think?  Go ahead and place your orders now.  Girl dog?  I’ve got mini chandeliers!  😉

Just wait til you see the house I’m building for Turd Butt!

What do you think of the heated foam roller, are you going to order one?

Five Miles is heaven…

I got a lot done this weekend.  A lot.  But not everything.   After working inside at my desk for a bazillion hours last week I couldn’t wait to work outside Saturday and Sunday and I got most of the lawn finished.  I cleaned up all the broken limbs from the hurricane that wasn’t, I raked up all the leaves from the sweet gum tree and I swept off all the patios areas.  I re-mulched all the mulched areas and replaced some of the beat up pavers and I cleaned off and mopped up the entire lanai.

I cleaned most of the inside of the house but before I could finish the weekend was over and I didn’t even get to all of my personal paperwork that’s been mounting on my desk in the bedroom.  I was so tired that I had to ask MacGyver to take the trash cans down to the curb when he came home from hunting which prompted him to ask me if I had also had time to clean up the garage for him.


Do you want to repeat that? Are you sure? Think about it….

Yeah, he is crazy.  He’s still alive too, barely.

You may remember that my nephew and his family were in town last week.  My nephews wife is very much like me in the sense that we are both ‘Dr. Doolittle’s and tend to speak to the animals or rather they speak to us.

This is probably why I don’t find it odd at all when I hear that she’s been speaking to deer or chickens, and I don’t think she finds it odd to hear that I’ve been feeding a peacock or a turtle, by hand of course.

Anyway, a few days after they arrived at our Nokomis house she called to tell me that she had rescued a squirrel in the backyard because his momma had been mean to him and wouldn’t take care of him.  She tried to release him but he had already imprinted on her and now he was hers.

I sent her a video of me feeding the peacocks the day before they left to head home.  I wanted to send one of Charles watching TV because I’m positive he asked me to turn the channel but I missed it and didn’t get it on video, I only got a picture and I didn’t think it had the same impact as a video would have besides who believe that a peacock prefers football over fishing but I swear he does.

peacock watches tv

I was wrong about the impact of photos obviously because when my nephew and the family left on Sunday they sent me the following photo as they were driving home with their new family member and it was then that I realized a picture is worth a thousand words.

Squirrely gets a new life

Goodbye cruel world, I’m going home!

I ran almost 10 miles total last week y’all!  I didn’t run at all over the weekend because I knew I had a lot to do and I didn’t want to push it and that’s okay.  I’m running again and that’s all that matters.  Last week I I had a total of 34 miles, 10 of those running and 24 walking.

Can you guess what I had planned for this morning?


Yes, that’s it, that’s what I had planned.  But Hank would not cooperate.

Okay, that’s not what I had planned.  Actually I planned a five mile run.

Five miles baybee.  And I got up and got it done.  It wasn’t the easiest five miles and I struggled a little toward the end but it wasn’t horrible and I did it.  I. did. It.

And after today, only 8 more days until I see the gastroenterologist!  And I cannot believe I just got excited about that.  Such a weirdo.  I have an excuse though, I was dropped as a baby.  No really I was….


Have a fantastic Monday.

Did you run this weekend?

Did you know that peacocks like football?

WTF Wednesday, that time the peacocks attacked me.

First things first, Happy Birthday to my baby brother! The kid who used to stay up with me, all hours of the night, playing Frogger on the old Nintendo system. I sure do miss those days. (I also pretty much gave away the fact that we’re old.)


Those graphics….we used to thing they were something back in the day!

And now back to our regularly scheduled blog post.

I try not to look at the weather forecast because it’s always the same, hot and humid, but this week I heard there was a storm out in the Atlantic so I took a look and holy cold front, have you seen this?

weather forecast
84 as a high and 68 as a low, yes please!  I was so excited by the forecast that I woke up determined to run outside this morning but I forgot that the lower temperatures don’t arrive until Saturday.

Currently we’re sporting these temps:

current weather

Not too bad, somewhat tolerable

I headed out anyway determined to get in a good run. And by good, I mean at least 5 or 6 miles.

The run started off just fine. It wasn’t too terribly hot and it was still a bit dark. As the sun started to rise I finished my first mile. It was slow but otherwise fine. As I started the second mile I rounded a corner and ran smack dab into these guys:

Mama Peacock
Except there were about 40 of them, white ones too, and a lot of babies. I wish I had a picture of what ensued next, but it looked a lot like this:

Attacked by fowl

Just imagine that’s a peacock about twice the size, and picture my face, and then me screaming, yeah, that would be accurate.

Don’t they realize I’m the bitch who feeds their sorry asses on the reg?  Where do they think they’re gonna eat now?  That attack was clearly fowl!  (See what I did there?)

Anyway, after finally getting the peacock’s off of me, (there were two bastards who did not want to leave me alone) I continued on.

I ran down a street that I wouldn’t normally run on and I think I was so happy to be away from the peacock’s that I wasn’t paying close attention to the sidewalk below because if I had been I would have seen that it looked similar to this:

uneven sidewalk

This is not the actual sidewalk but it’s a very good representation.

Now, in case you don’t know me, I’m not the most graceful girl on the planet. Some might even go so far as to say that I’m clumsy.  MacGyver calls me a ‘walking disaster’ but whatever the case, the inevitable was bound to happen.

And it looked almost like this:

tripping on a sidwalk
BOOM, face plant.  Yep, I did.

Fortunately for me, the only damage was to my thumb.

thumb injury

Typing is going to be a real treat for the next few days.

After the face plant I decided that I should probably just end the run right there.  I did manage to get in 3 slow miles though so that’s better than nothing.

When I got home I noticed that my new armband was getting a bit stinky. I decided to wash it but first I had to look for the washing instructions.

And then I found them…

washing instructions
Ummmm, well, ummmm, wha, what the hell does that even mean?

Some days you can’t win for losing.  I think it’s probably in my best interest not to leave the house for the rest of the day.  Is it Wednesday already? WTF?  It IS Wednesday!

Your turn, spill it, tell me one of your WTF moments from the week.