WTF Wednesday, Fog, Yellow Trees, and Chokers

Good morning!  I woke up in Jolly old London this morning…

foggy

Kidding!

That’s actually the pond in my backyard!  That is also why I decided to run my five miles in my neighborhood instead of Kapok Park and around Alligator Lake because um, ALLIGATORS!  I mean seriously, if you can’t see five feet in front of you do you really want to chance missing a gator in the middle of the path?

I didn’t think so?

And if you don’t believe that fog is dangerous, trust me, it is.  This is the second morning we’ve had it and the second morning of serious accidents.  So  people beware, if you can’t see this…..

stop sign

There is a stop sign up there, I promise there is…

Slow down and drive safely!

I finally got all my decorations up even though I went sparse this year.  I only put up 3 trees in the Clearwater house instead of the normal 6 or 7.  I was gonna stick with 2 but then I found all the cute pink decorations I bought on clearance last year and I was compelled to use them.  Compelled!

I had to find an old artificial tree though and the only one I could find was kind of jacked up but it worked.  In case you’re wondering why we don’t buy real trees, it’s really quite simple.

His name is Hank.

We spent his entire life teaching him to go outside to pee on trees and when we brought one inside he could not for the life of himself understand why he could not pee on it.  So we go with artificial.

If you look really close there is a yellow stain at the bottom of the tree…..

Obviously, he still pees on it, it’s just much easier to clean up!  And unless I want to wash it all the damn time I’ve learned not to put the tree skirt down until Christmas Eve.

Oh, and unless I want pee soaked presents, they also stay hidden until Christmas morning….oh the sacrifices I make for that little sh…bundle of joy.

I’ve almost finished my Christmas shopping.  I just need a few last-minute things.  Yesterday I was looking for some earrings online  for my niece who recently got her ears pierced and in the accessories all these chokers kept popping up.  Are chokers all the rage right now?  I mean, I realize they’re sort of popular but I hate the jean ones, and my Lord, why is this thing cool?

Just cut off the waist band of your pants and go.

That’s God awful!  I hope I never see that on anyone, I might seriously laugh.  I really might and I’m all about being fashion forward and expressing yourself but that’s just ridiculous.

I’m gonna go cut up a dish towel and make myself a choker.

WTF It’s Wednesday

What’s the most ridiculous fashion nightmare you’ve seen this year?

Friday four, Season training, teeth, gators and yoga.

The weekend is almost here but before this week is over I have four things I really need to tell you about.

The first thing is the thing I’m most excited to tell you about and I’ll go into more details next week but I’ve coming up with a year-long training plan that you guys can follow along with. Yes, I said year-long because I’m breaking it down into seasons and there will be challenges for every seasons and cool stuff, really.

CCaIZ6bW4AE7OoI

Unfortunately it’s not this cool because let’s face it, this would be awesome.

It will look something like this….

Spring – Strength training, time to get strong
Summer – Speed training, Hills and fartleks here I come.
Fall – Further, bring on the distance baby!
Winter – Winning! Time to try for a PR or distance goal, or both? 😉

Stay tuned for more about the whole year-long thing.

Next I’ve got more of a public service announcement for pet owners. Y’all sock away your pennies just in case, cause veterinarian dentistry is expensive! I brush Hanks teeth daily and I feed him only dry, hard dog food. Still, he managed to build up some decay so I had to schedule a yearly cleaning for him. I just scheduled one for the kid and with insurance it was 30 bucks so I figured with no insurance and Hank being a dog, it would be around 75-100 bucks.

bubba teeth

We don’t need no stinkin dentist!

Um, no. Four Benjamins y’all!  $400 freakin dollars and that was cheaper than all the other vets around us because in order to get all that tarter off the back teeth they’re gonna have to knock his butt out.

Oh, and he needs x-rays because he has a broken tooth! Jeez.  The good news is that Hank doesn’t mind the vet, he loves all the attention. The only thing he doesn’t like is when I pay attention to the other dogs there.

I can’t help it. I’ve got a soft spot for sick dogs and I just feel the need to give them a little extra attention. Of course when I come back over to Hank, he’s all pouty and refuses to look at me.

jealous dog
And since we’re on the subject of animals, I have got to tell you about Rambo. Rambo is a 6 foot alligator who sleeps in the same bed with his HUMAN momma. He wears clothes, rides an ATV and even gives kisses.  KISSES!

Look at that sweet face....

Look at that sweet face….or not.

Oddly enough the woman is from Florida….(that’s sarcasm y’all). Did I mention Rambo is six feet long? Read more here.

Last thing is the one thing I thought I would never really enjoy, yoga. I’ve been doing these easy little Youtube yoga sessions and they are changing my life. It’s really helping my back pain and it’s geared toward those with scoliosis. This one is by far my favorite.

You know what the best part is? I can do that yoga workout and a gazillion other ones on Youtube all from the comfort of my Om sweet Om. (See what I did there?)

Tell me something about your week, anything…