WTF Wednesday, I crushed it, literally

Oh man did I have a great post planned…but typing is hard yo.  Well, not typically but for now.

Last night MacGyver and I were trying to move a  heavy piece of furniture and after we got it on the dolly he pulled while I pushed.  We had to go across the lawn and I felt the furniture shift so I put my hand down to catch it.  Because you know, it only weighs 3 or 400 pounds.

me in hospital

That would be me in the hospital because I crushed it, literally, as in my finger.

I have a broken finger that was technically crushed and an open fracture which has been sutured and luckily, by the grace of God, I still have a finger tip but no nail and it may never grow back.  I have to see an orthopedic surgeon in a few days to find out and see about the real damage.  It’s pretty painful though, I can tell you that.

MacGyver and I took a picture of the actual injury before they sutured it and splinted it, you know because we have the curiosity of 12 year old boys.  I’m not posting it here but for the record, it was hella gross.  And we were both pretty impressed.

WTF it’s Wednesday and typing is a skill I no longer have right now but I’m still crushin it. 😉

WTF Wednesday, it could only happen to me.

Today I finally did it.  Despite all of the opportunities that I’ve had over the years today was the first time that I actually did it and believe me it was completely unintentional.

For the past few days I’ve gone out for a run early in the morning.  Yesterday I was ecstatic that I was able to complete 5 full miles without stopping once.  The key for me is running so slow my brain feels like I’m walking because it is stupid hot, even at 6:30 in the morning.

Anyway, I decided to try and duplicate my efforts from yesterday and run another 5 this morning.  So, I headed out around 7AM, a little later than usual, and that is why I ran into one of my neighbors.  He showed me a red spot on his arm and told me that it came from a poisonous caterpillar.  He said when he went for a walk yesterday it fell out of a tree and hit his arm and it stung him and he told me to be careful.

I wasn’t too worried about poisonous caterpillars to be honest, I mean, I’ve never really seen them at the park and even if they are there, I don’t typically run under trees so I didn’t really give it a second though.

I ran 4 miles at a pretty slow pace and it seemed to go by fairly easily but at 4.2 miles I decided to walk a bit.  And that’s when it happened.  Something dropped from the sky and landed right in my shirt.  It went into my sports bra and took up residence right between my sisters.  Yep right there.


I had no idea what it was but I could feel it squirming and all I could think about was poisonous caterpillars so I yanked my shirt up but I couldn’t get to it.  The whole thing probably lasted about 3 seconds but it seemed like it took forever as I yanked my sports bra up and grabbed the squirming creature.  The ‘creature’ turned out to be a lizard.  A freaking lizard.

And I flashed at least 3 people.

flashing pun

WTF, it’s Wednesday, a lizard jumped in my shirt before 8AM and I didn’t die, bring it!

WTF Wednesday, it’s hard to sneeze when you’re in a coma

My brain is on vacation.

Last night I forgot to take out my contact lenses and after I washed my face I put on my readers and then watched an hour of TV before heading off to bed all the while wondering why I couldn’t see the television in my glasses.  It never occurred to me that I had forgotten to take out my contact lenses and I never realized I was wearing my readers.

oh my god

Until this morning.  I got up to take Hank out and my eyes felt weirdly dry and like something was stuck in them.  I assumed I had eye boogers, so I took off my glasses and tried to wipe out the corners of my eyes with a tissue and then I realized that I could see really clearly without my glasses.  DUH!


I never sleep in my contact lenses unless I’m taking a power nap late in the afternoon and even then, it’s always less than an hour.  Thankfully my eyes are fine for now but  this is all the fault of Benadryl.

I’ve been weeding my lawn a little every night in between little breaks in the rain and it’s affecting my allergies horribly. So, I took two Benadryl about an hour before bed last night, because it’s hard to sneeze and itch when you’re in a coma.

I’m still waking up over here, I’ll see ya tomorrow.  WTF, It’s Wednesday and Benadryl is some serious shit.

Do you feel hungover after taking Benadryl?